


Someday.

by EmmyGreene



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Alternate Universe - Future, Beth Greene Lives, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Other, Rape/Non-con Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-17
Updated: 2017-01-27
Packaged: 2018-09-18 06:19:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9371948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmmyGreene/pseuds/EmmyGreene
Summary: Set about five years from when Beth was taken from Daryl at the funeral home. Team family living at Alexandria without certain events ( eg no Negan).Beth is found after suffering numerous traumas, can they help her to heal?





	1. Found

**Author's Note:**

> Well this is a lot darker than anything I normally write so I'm going to basically say 'sorry not sorry' because once this story came to me, I had to get it out. Not sure if some characters seem a little OOC so apologies if so but given there's a time shift that may account for some of it... I'd also really love some feedback so feel free to comment/critique... I'm a lit major so any help to improve my writing style is always appreciated...also not American so apologies for any lingo/colloquialisms that may slip in/seem out of place...

They were on a mission to find medical supplies, they were running low again. The plan was to search every school, day care, office block for anything that may have been overlooked. Five hours of driving so far had earned them a basic first aid kit from an accounting firm and painkillers and anti-histamine from the attached apartment. Rick slowed down in front of a half-burned down school building.   
‘You think it’s worth checkin’?’ Daryl asked.  
‘We’re desperate’ Rick replied.  
The second car pulled up beside them and Rick told Abraham to park a block away, they’d park in the opposite direction and meet back there.   
Sasha and Abraham met them at the assigned spot and they checked the outside before entering. Someone else had clearly been through it, furniture upturned and drawers pulled open, their contents emptied out on the floor. They were about to enter the staffroom when they heard voices. Without a word they crouched in an attempt to conceal themselves.  
‘We’re out of pills but she’s locked up in there, won’t be a problem’ they heard a man’s voice.   
‘Thought you couldn’t lock the door?’ a deeper voice replied.   
‘Chained her to the desk’ his companion explained.  
‘She won’t scream? Cause a fuss?’   
‘Her? She’s scared of her own shadow. She’ll sit where I left her until we’re back, left the bitch some water but wasn’t wasting anymore food.’  
The voices faded out and the group cautiously got back to their feet.  
‘We gotta find whoever they were talking about’ Sasha said  
Abraham shook his head   
‘Don’t wanna get tied up in a mess, best we just get on out of here and hope we don’t cross paths with them on the way out’ he said but Sasha was already headed down the hall. Rick shrugged and followed her, she opened a small office door and gasped.  
The men rushed to her side and took in the room. It was littered with empty booze bottles and trash, it stank like something rotten and right in the middle was an old desk with a young woman chained to the bottom of it. Long blonde hair streaked with blood covered her face and she was bent over sobbing. She wore a black satin robe but her bared legs were covered in cuts and bruises down to the ankle the chain was twisted around. A bowl of water sat to the left of her. She had obviously heard them but didn’t look up.   
Sasha crouched down beside her,   
‘Hi, are you Ok? We’re here to help’ she spoke slowly but the girl didn’t respond.   
‘Please let us help you, we can get you out of here’ she tried again.  
‘Go away’ a hoarse voice replied.   
‘We’re not going to leave you here. We’re good people’   
‘It’s not safe, you need to leave’ the voice was barely more than a whisper.  
Sasha reached out to touch her and the girl tried to push her away, facing them in the process. Her face wasn’t as damaged as the rest of her but her nose was bleeding and her eye was black. Nothing could stop them recognising those blue eyes though.  
‘Beth’ exclaimed Daryl and Rick in unison.  
Sasha looked the girl in the face and saw they were right, Beth Greene, after all this time.  
The three men closed in on her, Abraham recognising the name of Maggie’s long lost sister.  
‘Beth, it’s so good to see you’ Sasha smiled at her and slowly saw recognition in Beth’s eyes.   
‘Sasha, Daryl, Rick?’ she looked at each of them and shook her head ‘you can’t be here’   
‘We’re here’ Daryl knelt down beside her and she froze.   
‘You can’t be’ she insisted.  
‘Beth, can we see your leg? We’re going to get you out of here’ Rick cut in.  
Beth looked up at him.  
‘Are you, are you OK?’ she asked.   
He nodded.  
‘More than OK, we’ve got somewhere safe to live, food, community. Maggie’s there too’ he said.   
He went straight to her ankle and tried to figure out how to remove the chain.   
‘We need cutters’ he said   
‘Haven’t got any’ Abraham said. Then he looked at the desk.   
‘Daryl, help me lift this, we’ll slide the chain off then cut her out back home’.  
‘No, no, no’ she cried but they did it anyway.  
She looked at Sasha and pleaded ‘don’t take me, you can’t, I have to stay here, I can’t’   
Sasha tried to pull Beth to her feet but Beth refused.  
Rick looked up at Daryl. He could see the shock and hurt across his face. Daryl met his gaze briefly then looked away before focusing his attention on Beth.  
‘You aint got no choice Beth, we gotta go’ he said and scooped her up into his arms. Beside him Rick grabbed the dangling chain and they headed for the door. Abraham ran ahead and checked they were clear. Beth was shaking, sobbing, struggling but Daryl just held her tighter. She was bony, her movements almost frail, she’d be lucky to weigh 70 pounds he thought.   
As they got to the door she looked up at him  
‘You’ve carried me like this before’ she whispered.  
‘I have’ he confirmed as she spat in his eye.   
He looked straight at Sasha who gave a sympathetic face.   
Rick pulled her aside   
‘I’m going to travel with Abraham. We’ll aim to get there before you, give people the heads up so she’s not crowded the moment we arrive.’ He said ‘you travel with her and Daryl, and watch him, he’s...’   
Sasha cut Rick off   
‘I know’ she said. She understood, they’d all watched Daryl lose part of himself as he tried in vain to search for her, mourned her loss, couldn’t bear to hear anyone speak her name. Sasha never asked him about it but she understood, in his own way, Daryl had loved her.  
Once they left the building Beth screamed but her voice was so weak it gave out. She pounded her fist against Daryl’s chest but he wouldn’t put her down.   
‘You right to drive?’ Sasha asked, but one look at his face gave her the answer. There were tears in his eyes and an expression she hadn’t seen on him for a long time, not since he’d come back from Atlanta after following that car and getting nowhere.   
Beth pushed herself as far away from him as she could in the car, pressing her body against the door. Sasha fetched a blanket from the trunk and placed it over Beth who promptly covered her face with it. Daryl let out a sob so Sasha got in the front and drove.   
Two hours later they had to stop for a bathroom break. Beth hadn’t stopped crying or repeating ‘no, no, you can’t, it’s not safe’ as she rocked back and forth in the back seat. Daryl turned the walkie talkie on and walked away from the vehicle. Sasha turned to face Beth in the back.   
‘I remember the first time I saw you’ she spoke, calmly, ‘you were holding Judith and she was just a few days old. She was so beautiful and I was in awe, because I never thought I’d see a baby again. She was, pink and perfect and in your arms. You were so good with her; we all assumed she was yours. Even when we knew she wasn’t, it was easy to forget because you were a natural with her, so sweet and patient.’   
In the back seat Beth had finally gone still, Sasha kept on talking.  
‘You were like that with all of us, so nice and kind, unless someone pissed you off. I think we all took you for granted a bit, how special it was to meet someone so genuinely sweet in a world like this’ Sasha continued.  
‘I realise now how strong that made you, how you were still in high school and your world got turned upside down but every day you got up at the crack of dawn with that baby and made breakfast for us and sang while you did it’. Beth pulled the blanket off her head.   
‘They’re going to kill me’ she said flatly.  
Sasha shook her head.   
‘No they aren’t. We got you’   
Beth sighed and looked back out the window. When Daryl returned to the car she pretended not to notice.   
‘Everything alright?’ Sasha asked him  
‘They got, uh, held up’ he replied, throwing a glance in Beth’s direction to indicate he wouldn’t expand further, ‘asked us to wait another ten before moving on’.   
‘You OK?’ she asked him.  
He shook his head and looked away.   
They sat there in complete silence until Sasha started the car again.   
‘Daryl, there’s apples in that black bag’ she spoke ‘can you get one out for me?’ he fished around in the bag for the fruit and handed it over.   
‘Beth, do you want one?’ she asked   
‘I already ate today’ Beth mumbled into the window.  
They let it go and drove on into Alexandria. Beth covered her face back up and rocked quietly in her seat, mumbling to herself.  
As they got closed Daryl turned the walkie talkie back on.   
Rick advised them to drive straight to Maggie’s house.   
‘Will I see Maggie?’ Beth asked softly, to the surprise of the others who hadn’t really thought she was listening. She’d revealed her face again and Daryl couldn’t help but notice how big her eyes looked on her face, she was too thin and it made all her features somewhat exaggerated.  
‘Yeah, she’s waiting for ya, with Glenn’ Daryl said.  
‘They’re supposed to be dead’ she said meekly.  
Daryl shook his head ‘nah not those two’   
Beth began banging her head against the car window again.  
Daryl reached his arm out to stop her.   
‘Beth, don’t’ he said.  
She turned and gnashed her teeth at him. Then she began to cry, real tears that made her shoulders heave and appeared more sad than angry.   
‘I don’t even know who’s alive’ she said looking down at the ground.  
‘We’ve all been there’ Sasha spoke again in her calm voice ‘we’ll walk you through it, slowly’.   
When the car pulled up Beth froze again.  
‘I can’t get out’ she said.  
Rick opened the door to her but she wouldn’t move. Not until she saw Maggie behind him, a baby girl in her arms. Beth’s face broke into a smile  
‘Judith’ she said  
Rick shook his head and spoke slowly, as though talking to a small child ‘Beth, Judith’s four now, she’s a big girl. That’s Maggie’s baby’ Beth looked at him with disbelief.  
Maggie passed the baby to Sasha and stood next to Rick.  
‘Beth, Bethy, you’re here’ she said crying.   
Daryl met Abraham and Glenn on the front steps of the house but otherwise the street was empty. Rick had told everyone to give them some space. Everyone had been eager to greet Beth but Rick warned them she’d be overwhelmed.  
Slowly they ushered her into the house. Although there were plenty of seats, Beth threw herself down on the floor. She pulled the blanket up to her chin and looked afraid. The baby cried again and Beth looked at Rick.  
‘That’s not Judith?’ she questioned.  
‘No, that’s Elsie, see how dark her eyes are, not like Judith’s’   
Maggie moved over to where Beth was sitting and showed her the baby.   
‘Elsie, this is your Aunt Beth’ she said quietly.  
Beth looked at the baby and smiled a little.  
‘She doesn’t look like you’ she whispered.   
Maggie shook her head and smiled ‘Nope, she’s all Glenn.’   
‘but Judith’s alive?’ Beth questioned.  
‘She is, she’s four now’ Rick repeated, ‘she’s at home, with Carl and Michonne’   
Beth shook her head. ‘They aren’t alive’   
‘They are Beth. And Carol too’   
Beth shook her head and looked back at the baby.   
‘How old is she?’  
‘Seven months’ Maggie said  
Beth looked around the room, cautiously as though it would hurt to make eye contact with anyone.  
‘I think times all gone funny, in my head’ she said.  
Nobody knew what to say and Beth started shaking.  
‘Or I’m dead and this isn’t real. Or I’m dreaming’ she started sobbing. Maggie handed the baby to Glenn and threw her arms around her sister.  
‘It’s not a dream Beth, it’s real, we’re here, we’re all here with you and we love you so much’. Beth pushed her away and hissed at her sister ‘I can’t believe that.’   
Abraham reappeared there with chain cutters, he handed them to Rick who came and crouched next to Beth. ‘Is it OK if I cut these?’ he asked. She nodded but covered her face beneath the blanket. Rick set to work freeing Beth from her chains.  
‘Left a hell of a bruise’ he said to the room; then gestured that the rest of them should join him in the kitchen.


	2. Shattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: There's some physical and sexual abuse in this and the majority of chapters ahead so please don't continue to read if these topics are distressing to you.

The room slowly cleared out, leaving Beth alone with Maggie. ‘We thought you could stay here, with me and Glenn’ Maggie said crouching opposite Beth. ‘and the baby?’ Beth asked. ‘that’s right and the baby’ Beth looked up at the roof. ‘I thought you were all dead, they told me over and over you were all dead. But you weren’t, you were all here together’ she said. Maggie gave her a sad smile. ‘We tried to find you Beth. Daryl, he went crazy searching for you, tracked you as far as Atlanta, got all of us organised to search the city for you but it didn’t work, well I guess you know that’. ‘I don’t think I was in Atlanta very long’ Beth said then she closed her eyes and pulled the blanket tighter around herself.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_She woke up inside a warehouse, on top of a stained, old mattress; naked, her hands and feet tied up with rope. She tried to wiggle her wrist free but there was no point. Her limbs were numb, she could only move her head. She tried to focus on the room around her, she quickly realised she was one of a number of naked girls, all lined up on the floor. She let out a small scream and within moments there was a rough hand over her mouth._

_‘This one’s awake’ a deep voice called out._

_Beth could see a thick dark beard above her eyes. Within moments a second man joined him. ‘_

_Well, sit her up’ he ordered._

_They tried to sit Beth up but she slumped back. ‘_

_Still useless’ the deeper voice spoke._

_He leant over her and pinched her breast ‘I don’t mind them like this’ he said._

_With her mouth free again Beth screamed and instantly felt a blow across her forehead._

_‘You don’t make a fucking sound’ He said._

_‘Get her some water’ said the other man ‘can’t afford to lose any more of them’._

_‘You stay quiet, you get water, you scream, you get thrown out to the lurkers. Up to you’_

_A silent tear slid down Beth’s cheek. She couldn’t even move. She saw a girl on the mattress next to her look at her with a panic stricken face._

_‘Just stay quiet’ she whispered to Beth, ‘they’ve already thrown two girls outside’_

_‘Where are we?’ Beth asked her._

_‘No idea’ the girl said then closed her eyes and turned her head away._

_The man came back and held Beth’s head up to a straw._

_‘Drink’ he commanded and she obliged, her throat was dry. She had no idea how she’d gotten here. She remembered being at the hospital in Atlanta but it didn’t feel safe. She’d escaped and then... then she woke up here. She finished sipping from the straw and the man stood up and kicked her in the head._

_‘You shut your mouth until we come back for you’ he ordered. She closed her eyes and pretended she was somewhere else._

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maggie looked her sister over, noticed the blood streaked through her hair and dirty nails.

‘Come upstairs with me, how about you have a shower?’ she offered.

Beth shook her head. ‘I can’t shower’ she said.

‘You have to get cleaned up Beth’ Maggie said softly, ‘it looks like it’s been a while.’

Beth violently shook her head. ‘It’s, it’s not allowed’

‘Beth, look at me, nobody here is going to tell you you’re not allowed to shower’

Beth huddled closer in around herself. ‘I don’t want to’ she said.

Maggie stood up ‘Please Beth, even if you don’t want to shower, why don’t you come upstairs with me? We can get you dressed.’

She stood up slowly and followed her sister. They went into Maggie’s room. ‘What about if I give you a washcloth and you clean up with that?’ Maggie asked. Beth nodded and stripped down. Maggie handed her a cloth and ran the water. She couldn’t help but stare in shock at her sister’s body. Beth had always been skinny but now she was a walking skeleton, her bones protruding all over the place and absolutely covered in scars and bruises. She fished through her drawers looking for anything small enough to fit Beth. She found black yoga pants and a soft cotton shirt, they’d be too big but they’d have to do. Beth winced as she pulled the cloth over her skin. She had burns on her stomach that still hurt and just last week she’d needed stitches on her thigh that were tender to touch.

‘You OK?’ Maggie asked.

Beth looked up at her and shook her head. ‘I don’t know what’s happening’ she said hopelessly.

‘We’ll fix that’ Maggie said smiling at her sister, ‘Would you mind letting the doctor have a look at you?’

Beth was dressed and staring at herself in the mirror. She spent a long time taking in the features of her reflection. She traced the outline of each scar, rubbed at her hair. Maggie sat on the bed with a sinking feeling in her stomach as she watched Beth take it all in. Then, without warning Beth ripped the mirror off the wall and threw it to the ground. The glass broke into tiny pieces and the noise echoed through the house. Within moments Glenn and Daryl appeared at the door.

‘She seemed alright’ Maggie said to them.

Daryl strode through to where Beth was ‘glass everywhere’ he said then looked at Beth who was shaking.

He put his hand out ‘C’mon, you don’t wanna stand on any’

She just stood there shaking so he kicked the glass out of his way and picked her up, placing her on Maggie and Glenn’s bed and covering her with a blanket. Glenn got to work fixing the mess. Beth stared straight at the roof.

‘She was fine, I thought she was fine and then...’ Maggie was in awe of what her sister had just done and repeated herself. Beth’s eyes had gone glassy, like she wasn’t even there.

‘Beth, Beth’ Daryl snapped his fingers over her and she didn’t respond at all. Defeated he leant against the wall.

Hesitantly Maggie laid herself on the bed next to her sister. She thought for a few moments before speaking in the softest voice she could manage, the one she normally reserved for whispering sweet nothings to the baby.

‘Beth, Bethy, do you remember how you used to read Green Eggs and Ham over and over? You drove me and Shawn nuts with that. You even made Momma make you that Sam-I-Am costume for Halloween. I think I heard you read that book out loud so many times I still know it by heart.’

Beth’s glassy eyes were still fixed on the roof, she hadn’t even acknowledged her sisters presence on the bed.

Maggie took a deep breath and recited ‘I Am Sam. Sam I am. That Sam-I-Am that Sam-I-Am, I do not like that Sam-I-Am Do you like Green Eggs and Ham?’ and so she continued on through the story.

Glenn had finished cleaning the glass by now and sat at his wife’s feet.

‘Her eyes are closed’ he whispered. ‘Think she’s sleeping?’ Maggie asked. He shrugged. He nodded for Maggie to look in Daryl’s direction; he’d sunk to the floor now, chewing on his thumb and a defeated look on his face.

‘Daryl, you want to go home?’ Glenn asked.

He nodded slowly. Before he left he leaned back over Beth’s face. He muttered something nobody understood and left.

‘He’s taking it pretty hard’ Glenn commented.

‘He’s always blamed himself for losing her’ Maggie replied.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_She soon learned it was easier to pretend to be asleep. You didn’t have to face what was happening that way. She’d spent three days on that wretched mattress. She’d had to lie in her own piss and have food shoved down her throat. Around her the girls were beaten, kicked and occasionally injected with she didn’t know what, but none of them had the energy to move. She heard sobbing. They waited and waited. She wondered if she’d die on that mattress. One night they came and unbound her. They gave her an oversized t-shirt to wear. They untied the girl next to her as well, only she tried to fight back and received a blow to the head that rendered her unconscious. Beth let them lead her to a trailer and then panicked when it was obvious why she was in there._

_The man with the beard stroked her cheek._

_‘Good girl’ he said in a voice that gave her chills, ‘you’ve been a good girl in there, haven’t screamed in days. Well you better not start now’ he said and threw her down on the bed._

_She closed her eyes and thought about the farm. She thought about how it felt to milk a cow buy hand and carry the heavy buckets to her Momma. She thought about churning that milk into cream and butter. She thought about every detail of her Momma’s favourite apron, they one with the hand stitched cherries. When it was over he pulled himself off her and spat on her face ‘fucking whore’ he said and left. She cried silently and waited on that bed for hours before another man came and then another. At some stage a second girl was thrown in there too. She reached out and squeezed Beth’s hand. She closed her eyes and focused on that instead._


	3. Broken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, thanks for the lovely comments on the past two chapters, I've been really nervous about actually posting what I write and it's really encouraging so THANK YOU! 
> 
> Again, trigger warnings for this one because the stuff in the flashbacks is hard.

Daryl found Carol waiting for him when he got home. The two of them had moved into one of the smaller houses some time ago. Living with Rick and Michonne had begun to feel intrusive so they’d moved into the three bedroom house with the bright green door.

‘How was she?’ she asked expectantly.

Daryl just shook his head and threw himself down on the couch.

‘That bad?’Carol asked

He grunted again.

She sat in the arm chair opposite and waited. She knew Daryl was more likely to open up if he wasn’t pressed. She picked up some knitting she had beside the chair and continued on the sweater she was making for Elsie. It was twenty minutes before Daryl began to speak.

‘She’s a mess’ he said ‘screams, cries, nothing of her, she’s just bones, covered in bruises. Seems to come good for a while then just snaps’.

He inhaled deeply and groaned then started again.

‘I shouldn’t have let it happen. Why’d I tell her to go outside? She could hardly walk. Maybe I could have...’ his voice trailed off. It was five years ago and yet he had replayed that night in his mind over and over again. He had tortured himself with it.

‘You’ve been over that night a hundred times. It doesn’t change anything’ Carol said gently.

‘I know but, you’ll see, she’s like a ghost of her former self.’

‘Any idea what happened to her?’ Carol’s voice was quiet

Daryl shrugged in response ‘Don’t take much to figure out. Two guys, her half starved and half naked, covered in bruises. Tied to a desk, freaks out when anyone touches her’

Carol nodded sadly.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Her name was Alice. She had deep brown hair and bright green eyes. She was the only person left in the world as far as Beth was concerned. They slowly figured things out. This trailer, with its blacked out windows and mouldy smell was to be their home. They were somewhere on the fringe of a community that traded with others in the area. They were a part of the goods to be traded. They were frequently threatened with violence but it was seldom dealt out and absolutely never on their faces. They were expected to look somewhat appealing. When it was only the two of them, Beth and Alice sang and talked. They would lie next to each other and try to remember entire books and movies, Alice was excellent at character voices, Beth was better at remembering the plots. They cried to each other. They split everything they were given fifty/fifty. The only thing they didn’t talk about was what happened when the men came in; they simply dealt with it and tried to distract themselves. They depended on each other for everything._

_\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Beth woke up screaming. She jumped up on the bed and began punching her fist through the wall. After three strikes she succeeded in breaking through the plaster and breaking her wrist. Maggie woke up and sprang into action, trying to stop her sister but Beth only swapped to her other arm.

‘Help, Glenn’ Maggie called out desperately.

She threw her arms around Beth’s shoulders in an attempt to calm her down and it must have worked to an extent. Beth sunk back down on the bed as Glenn ran in.

The baby cried out from the nursery.

‘What’s happening?’ Glenn asked

‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry’ Beth stared at the hole she’d just made in the wall.

‘She woke up’ Maggie said, by way of an explanation.

The baby cried out again.

‘She’ll want a feed’ Maggie sighed then looked at Beth

‘I’m going to nurse Elsie, are you OK with Glenn?’

Beth nodded

‘Just keep her down there’ Glenn whispered ‘...away from this’ he nodded his head to the wall.

Beth was still apologising, to the wall, to him, to herself? He wasn’t sure.

He noticed her wrist, hanging limp with her attached fist still red and angry.

‘Can I look at that?’ he questioned.

She shook her head and turned it over in her other hand, wincing as she did.

‘I think it’s broken’ she said quietly.

‘I think you’re right’ Glenn agreed. He perched cautiously at the end of the bed.

‘Not a bad effort though’ he added, gesturing towards the gaping wall.

‘I...I didn’t know where I was, when I woke up. My feet weren’t tied so I thought someone was with me. It’s strange though, because I never fight back but...something just came over me, anger I guess’

Glenn took a moment to digest what he’d just heard. Her words played over and over in his mind and his heart sank.

‘You weren’t tied?’ he asked

‘At night, they’d tie my feet so I didn’t try to run...I guess I got used to it’ she whispered.

‘Sorry, I shouldn’t pry’.

Beth shrugged, ‘It’s not a big deal. It just, it doesn’t feel real, like my mind hasn’t caught up yet. I don’t remember getting into bed or anything...it’s like my life is a story that belongs to someone else and I’m just watching it in bits and pieces, trying to make sense’  she sighed as if considering what she’d just said.

‘I was washing up and then, I just woke up in a bed’ she stated.

‘You smashed a mirror’ Glenn spoke softly, wondering if his words could trigger a recollection

‘Sometimes, I think I just shut down’

‘Maybe it was better that way, maybe you had to’ Glenn kept his voice even but on the inside he wanted to cry. He wanted to hurt whoever had done this to her, he wanted to do everything he could to make things right again and he wanted to shield Maggie from the worst of it.

Beth shifted so her back was against the bed head and lifted her wrist again.

‘Well that’s both of them now’ she said glumly

‘You want pain killers or something?’ he offered

‘The pains not so bad’ she replied.

‘I’ll go get something’ he said and walked to the nursery.

Beth closed her eyes and tried to clear her mind. She squeezed her toes together and focused on that instead.

 

‘We are not equipped to deal with this’ Glenn said to Maggie.

‘I know’ she said sadly.

‘and I’m worried about her in the house with Elsie’ he said.

‘What do we do? She’s my sister, she should be with me’ Maggie said

‘She needs to get that wrist looked at soon, she’s violent, she needs more help than we can give her’ he sighed, he loved Beth but he had to put his family first. It wasn’t safe to have Beth around the baby and he felt a little space might shield Maggie from the worst of it too.

‘What about Carol and Daryl?’ he suggested, ‘there’s no kids, they’ve both been through this’

Maggie sighed ‘I don’t think either of them have had it quite like this’ she said

‘He’d do anything for her’ Glenn said flatly

‘Yeah or he’ll completely fall apart about it’ she said

‘In which case, Carol’s there and she looks out for him and she’ll keep an eye on Beth; they spent so much time together at the prison and she’s level headed. Anyway, there our best option’

Maggie headed back to the bedroom with the sinking feeling her husband was right.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_His hand slapped across her face, hard enough to sting but not leave a mark._

_‘Can’t just lie there like you’re already dead you stupid bitch’ he sneered ‘aint nobody gonna trade shit for that. Ya gotta look alive’._

_Beth pressed her eyes closed harder, she thought of the sea, of paddling in the shallows, the way the sun hit the water._

_His palm calm down again on the other side._

_‘Ya dead or something? Open your damn eyes’_

_She did, she looked him right in the eyes and just as she saw him grin, she spat. She raised her hand and tried to strike him as hard as she could. She heard a crack and quickly realised it was her own wrist. That made him laugh and laugh._

_‘Fucking idiot’ he taunted, well we ain’t going to help you fix that. And you spit on me again and you’ll know about it.’ He spat on her face in retaliation._

_‘Or maybe you like that? Yeah? Maybe you’re a dirty whore who likes it rough?”_

_She looked up at the roof, she focused her eyes on the light fitting._

_‘That’s better’ he said ‘you keep those baby blues open, that’s what gonna get us through this winter. You keep those eyes open and there might even be a whole can of peaches in it for you. You southern girls sure love them peaches’ he continued to talk but Beth tuned him out. She learned that even with her eyes open, she could pretend she was far, far away; like he wasn’t there at all._

_He returned half an hour later. Beth was still lying on the bed, her gaze fixed on the roof as though it was the only thing that mattered._

_‘Get up, got them peaches’ he said with a laugh._

_She ignored him, focusing on that light instead._

_‘Beth, get up’ Alice urged_

_He walked over to the bed and grabbed her injured wrist then smashed the glass jar of peaches over it._

_‘You don’t ever try to hit me again’ he said then turned to Alice and hit her right in the abdomen_

_She doubled over in pain and he laughed some more ‘you hit me, I hit her’ he warned then stormed out._

_‘Beth, Beth’ Alice tried to speak her friends name but Beth had already checked back out._


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I actually finished writing this entire story this morning ( nothing like procrastination when you have a huge assignment due right?!) and will probably have it all up by the end of next week ( I'll read back over and edit what I wrote rather than publishing it all in one chunk)  
> But there's finally some cute nods towards Bethyl in this chapter and more coming up :)

The next morning Maggie took Beth to Denise and Tara’s to have her checked over.

Beth kept her face to the ground and mumbled. Her wrist was now throbbing and had kept her awake all night. She’d sat in the bed next to her sister and tried to put the events of her life into some kind of sequence. She couldn’t connect her memories, couldn’t be sure what had or hadn’t happened. Sometimes scenes played in her mind and they seemed so impossible she wondered if they really happened to her or had she read about them? Finally the long night passed and the day had started. She’d followed Maggie’s orders because it seemed easy but after a bowl of pureed apple she felt to full to eat anything else. She caught herself staring at the strangest things as though a spoon or doorknob was the missing piece of the puzzle.

‘I don’t know what to do’ Maggie whispered to Tara ‘she’ll seem completely fine then just blank out on us. I know it’s got to do with some kind of trauma but I’ve never seen anything like it.’

‘Well right now she’s flat out scared of a stranger’ Tara replied, ‘anyone can see that.’

‘Glenn’s talking to Daryl and Carol, wants to see if she can stay with them instead’

Denise walked over to them, Beth was now curled up on her side, staring at the wall.

‘She’s fine. I’ve set her wrist, cleaned up a couple of wounds. She’s malnourished, scared. Hard to assess her mental state when she won’t speak but that says enough in itself.’ Denise sighed ‘she needs time but we’ve got plenty of that, and people to care for her, but we’ve got them too. How’re you holdin’ up?’ she looked at Maggie.

Maggie shook her head ‘I don’t know. I was so excited when they said they had her but its hard seeing her like this.’

‘You’ve all got to give her some time. She’s not going to just bounce back to how it was and she doesn’t have too. It’s been years, we’ve all changed in that time’ she said.

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_They didn’t see food for a few days after that. There was enough water left in the pitcher and the spilled peaches on the bed but that was all._

_‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry’ Beth repeated over and over._

_‘It’s not your fault, it’s them, it’s all them’ Alice tried to console her._

_They were beyond hungry by the end of day two and lethargic. They lay in the bed together and talked about everything except food._

_Day three came and went and Beth realised it was the longest they’d been left alone since it all began._

_‘Do you think they’ll just leave us in here and that’s it?’ she asked Alice_

_‘I don’t know. Maybe there’s nobody to trade with’_

_‘Yeah but that’s normally when we see them.’_

_‘I think they’re just teaching us a lesson, or something, I don’t think they’ll just lock the door and leave us to die, not while we’re such a valuable commodity’ Alice wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince Beth or herself._

_They were curled up together on the bed. The blankets were thin and the winter was cold and long, they’d taken to sharing body heat and sleeping close together. Beth had grown to rely on that closeness and comfort._

_They dozed on and off through the afternoon when suddenly the door burst open._

_There were three men they’d never seen before. Beth closed her eyes out of habit._

_‘Beth, Beth open your eyes, think about your barn, remember you told me about that once, Beth, Bethy’ Alice was whispering frantically._

_Bethy. Only her family called her that. Jimmy had tried once and she’d corrected him. Her mother had called her nothing but Bethy and she simultaneously hated and loved the pet name. Now though it was triggering memories she didn’t want to face. The barn, her mom, her Momma coming out of the barn._

_She shuddered and shook, Alice grabbed for her hand but was quickly pulled away. There was another bunk on the other side of the trailer. Beth stared up at the light fitting like she had before. She couldn’t fight back, couldn’t do anything but the panic had set in and she was trembling. She felt rough hands hold her down. There were voices but she couldn’t make sense of their words. The image of her mother as a walker played over and over again in her mind._

_And then Alice was sitting beside her, stroking her hair._

_‘What happened?’ Beth asked_

_‘I think you passed out.’ Alice replied then sighed ‘or fell asleep or both. Anyway they’re gone but they left food. Not a lot but there’s a Twinkie each’_

_Beth nodded slowly. She was lying there and then sitting up, it felt like nothing had happened in between._

_‘How long...when did they leave?’ she asked Alice._

_‘Maybe an hour ago? I don’t know. You sat up and got dressed but, well you weren’t much better than a dead-one just moaning and glazed eyes, I sat with you and waited. I’m worried ‘bout you Beth’_

_‘Must be the lack of food’ Beth said dismissively. She couldn’t burden Alice with the panic she felt and besides, they had an unspoken rule not to talk about what happened when they weren’t alone._

_‘Then let’s eat’ Alice said and lead Beth to the table._

_\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Beth followed Maggie over to Daryl and Carol’s place. Glenn, Rick and Michonne had gone over to set things in place for Beth to move in.

‘It’s good to see you Beth’ Michonne said, taking in the sight of her and trying not to visibly react.

Beth made eye contact and nodded but didn’t speak. She hadn’t spoken all morning and she couldn’t say why, she just didn’t feel like it.

‘How’d it go with Denise?’ Rick asked, coming up behind Michonne and wrapping his arms around her waist.

Beth had not been expecting that and found herself blushing and looking away. She’d forgotten what real affection looked like, how naturally it came to people.

‘Went well, just got to get some food into her and let her rest’ Maggie said.

Everyone took a seat around the table and Carol produced a plate of her famous choc-chip cookies. She’d had to beg Olivia for the chocolate given how low their supplies were but she’d finally conceded. They passed the plate around the table but Beth ignored it’s presence.

‘Take one, they’re amazing’ Maggie said.

She just looked further down.

‘I’ll keep some aside for her later’ Carol said.

Then looked at Beth, ‘It’s so good to see you’ she said, ‘we were all just so happy to hear the news yesterday.’ Beth didn’t respond so Carol kept talking, ‘Glenn asked us about you staying here, with Daryl and I, would that be OK?’

Beth took a moment to process Carol’s words. She lived there with Daryl? Were they together now? She always thought they were more like siblings but then, she never thought she’d see Rick and Michonne together either. Had everyone partnered up? Had everyone just been living here in these big houses with running water and electricity and cookies while she’d been starving? Had they all fallen in love while she’d been through hell? She could feel herself start shaking. She felt sad and panicky and most of all angry she stood up and reached for the plate of cookies then hurled them at the wall.

With that Daryl stood up, kicked his chair away.

‘Fuck’ he cried out ‘the fuck is this?’

He looked at Beth

‘It’s not supposed to be like this’ he said then headed out the door, slamming it behind him.

Rick went to follow up but Michonne stopped him.

‘Let him go, he’ll come back when he’s ready’ she said.

Maggie looked at Glenn, how could they leave Beth here if Daryl was going to react like that? They knew he had a temper but it had been a while since they’d seen an old fashioned Daryl Dixon outburst.

Carol dropped to the floor and began to sweep the mess. Beth knelt down beside her.

‘I’m sorry’ she whispered ‘I seem to be doing a lot of apologising’

‘Well you seem to be doing a lot of breaking’ Carol replied.

She smiled and Beth could tell she didn’t mean it unkindly.

‘You’re not yourself Beth, but we all love you and we’re here for you. I’d like it if you stayed here, with me and Daryl’ she said.

‘Would that be alright?’ Maggie asked, crouching down beside her sister.

Beth nodded slowly.

‘I can stay here’ she said quietly ‘as long as Daryl doesn’t mind’

‘Don’t mind him’ Carol said ‘he’s just hurting too’

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_‘Did you ever kiss someone and regret it?’ Alice asked her._

_They spent their time swapping secrets and stories. They tried to keep each other distracted._

_‘No. I only had two boyfriends and I never kissed anyone else’ Beth said to her ‘Did you?’_

_‘I kissed my tennis coach at camp when I was sixteen. These other girls in my bunk dared me so I walked straight up to him the next day and planted one on his lips. He got fired for it. I felt awful.’_

_‘Oh that’s so unfair’ Beth replied, she paused for a moment._

_‘I regret not kissin’ someone’ she said thoughtfully._

_‘Who’s that?’ Alice questioned_

_‘Daryl’_

_‘The guy you were with before Atlanta? Wasn’t he way older?’_

_‘Yeah, I think that’s what put me off but we... I don’t know, maybe it’s silly and that’s why I never said anything before. I thought it was just a crush, some weird feelings because he was the only one left but now, I think about him a lot. I wish I’d had the chance to kiss him.’_

_‘I bet he wishes he’d kissed you’ Alice whispered._

_‘Maybe. It’s a long time ago now, he probably doesn’t even think about me anymore.’_

_‘It’s only been a year Beth.’_

_‘Is that all?’ Beth questioned her. It felt like they’d been trapped in this trailer forever._

_‘Well we’ve only had one winter. It might be a few months longer but yeah, I think about a year.’_


	5. Hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ones kind of short, it was going to be one with the following chapter but I split them because it was getting WAAAYY too long. It's a little easier to read than some of the previous ones too. 
> 
> Thanks again for the lovely feedback, totally made my day. I hope to publish the next chapter tomorrow.

Beth spent the rest of the day settling in at the smaller house. Sasha arrived with a box of clothes and other essentials for her.

‘Is Tyrese here?’ Beth asked her. She still wasn’t sure who of their group was at this place. She knew Judith and Carl were here but she hadn’t seen them yet, so maybe the other missing members of their prison family were somewhere too.

Sasha shook her head, ‘No, didn’t make it this far’ she said.

‘Sorry’

‘It was years ago now. I still miss him though’

‘He used to sing with me sometimes. I liked that’ Beth whispered.

‘You still sing?’ Sasha asked her

Now it was Beth’s turn to shake her head.

‘Not in a while. It hurts you know?’

Sasha shrugged.

‘Maybe it won’t someday’

Sasha turned to leave but before heading out the door she spoke again ‘It took me a while, when we arrived. I was hurting, I kept freaking out. I wasn’t in a good place, I was struggling. But these people, there our family, they stuck by me, they helped me heal. You’ll see, they’ll help you too.’

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Down stairs Rick sat with Carol, waiting for Daryl to return.

 ‘How’s he coping?’ Rick asked her.

‘You know him’ she said with a shrug and Rick nodded.

‘There’s burns on his arms; that’s happening again, blames himself, always has. He’s probably not emotionally equipped to see her like this; but he’ll get through it, in his own way’. Carol explained. She’d watched Daryl fall apart numerous times over the past few years. He felt things deeply and never quite knew how to process it.  Sometime after he’d returned from his failed Atlanta mission they’d notice the little burn marks. They became a physical indicator of his mental state, something they all looked out for.

Rick and Carol waited in silence. Upstairs Beth had been solidly sleeping, completely worn out.

A few hours later Daryl returned, covered in dirt, guts and blood, the smell of liquor on his breath and another cigarette burn on his arm. He was crying, heavily, something they were all seeing more and more of. In his own way, he was opening up to them.

 ‘wasn’t safe out there this drunk’ he spat as the threw the empty glass bottle onto the table. There was a never ending supply of alcohol at Alexandria if you knew the right people and Abraham had a habit of keeping them all well supplied.

‘you gotta calm down, reactin’ like this, it’s not helping anyone, it’s not going to help her’  Rick spoke sternly to Daryl. ‘We don’t know what she’s been through out there and we’ve gotta be strong, for her’.

Daryl nodded, wiping the last tears from his eyes, ashamed to have been caught crying in front of them all again. He just couldn’t get used to this, he knew he’d failed her out there and now he realised that more than ever.  Rick sat down next to him and softened his tone, Carol left the room, giving them privacy to talk.

‘None of us like seeing her like this’ he said ‘she was the sweetest girl I ever knew and it kills me to think someone else has done this to her.’

‘’m just so angry’ Daryl said ‘at myself’

‘Nobody tried harder than you to find her. ‘

‘She don’t know that.’

‘She does, we’ve told her. You can tell her again, maybe she needs to hear that, over and over, that she had someone who didn’t give up. Needs to know she matters to us.’ Rick looked up at Daryl again, took in the anguish on his face, realised just how upset he really was then finally asked a question he’d wondered about for a while.

‘We never really spoke about it, when you were alone together out there, did anything...’ Rick’s voice trailed off.

Daryl shook his head ‘nothin’ like that, just got closer, needed each other, started to appreciate her more, realised how strong she was. She was the last person I had left in the world and I was glad it was her.’ He said quietly. He’d never told any of their family how he felt about her. Once he broke down in front of Aaron who’d listened for over an hour as Daryl fumbled his way through telling his friend what Beth had meant. He’d never told the others about their last days together, about the shift in their relationship, about the hope that she gave him. They’d figured enough out on their own but he’d never articulated anything more than guilt at losing one of their own.

Carol came in then.

‘You alright?’ she asked Daryl.

He shrugged in response, the default Dixon reaction when you couldn’t find the words you needed.  

‘You know, you and me, we know better than most what it feels like to come out of this.’ She said sitting down opposite him.

‘We’ve just got to show her that we aren’t going to give up, that she’s valuable.’

Daryl looked up ‘i ain’t no shit about dealing with this’

‘No but you know about having someone treat you like crap, know how hard it is to get over that’.

‘You just let her know that you’re here for her’ Rick spoke

‘I know you, you’re a man of actions not words but I think this time, the best thing you can do for her is give her your patience and your time. That’s what we’ve all got to do. If it hurts us, then we console each other but it’s got to be best face forward to her. We’ve got to get her through this. All this time you’ve been telling me how you got it wrong that night, this is your chance to atone’ Carol said.

He went upstairs, Carol’s words churning over in his mind. He cared about her more than anyone else, enough that she’d haunted him all these years. He resolved to be whatever she needed, the kind of support he’d never had in the aftermath of his father. He would do everything in his power to get her through this.


	6. Talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Some pretty dark subject matter in this one, probably the worst of them all.. 
> 
> There's also one of the first bits I ever wrote for this story and it continues to be one of my favourites... and whilst I wasn't inspired by Peeta and Catniss, once I realised the parallels, it didn't stop me because I think it just makes sense after trauma...

Around 3 AM Daryl woke up suddenly, he never slept well after drinking. Tonight it wasn’t just that though, something told him Beth wasn’t in her bed. A quick check down the hallway revealed her open door and empty room so he went out looking for her. He went into the kitchen and filled a glass with water then heard her shifting in the living room, he walked toward the noise.

‘You alright?’ he asked her, although her puffy red eyes and the dark rings under them told him the answer.

‘I just don’t know what’s real or not anymore’ she said quietly.

Daryl handed her the water and she sipped slowly. She looked so small and fragile curled up on the arm chair. Her skin was almost translucent in the moon light.

‘D’you trust me?’ he asked her.

She smiled shyly at him.

‘I used to tell myself these stories, as a distraction, and you were always the knight in shining armour. I never believed in all that, never wanted a man to save me, but I couldn’t fight them on my own, you know and I just kept praying that you’d somehow find me and save me’ she blushed. ‘I know, it’s stupid but I’d pretend I was a princess locked in a tower or a swan trapped in a lake, like Odette’ she said softly.

He smiled at her ‘yer a bit like a princess’ he said gently ‘got that fairytale hair but yer not like them, yer tough.’

Her cheeks flushed and he continued to talk.

‘I wanted to save you’ he explained, ‘I tried to find you. I chased that car all night but I couldn’t keep up. Then I saw it one night maybe a week later, and followed it into Atlanta but I never saw sight of it again.’

‘It wasn’t them’ Beth said quietly ‘that car. They took me to a hospital and I got out from there. Then I woke up in this warehouse, they’d found me on the street and took me. I guess, that’s what the others said. I couldn’t remember. That’s the problem, my memory, it’s full of gaps and then I told myself so many stories while I was there and now I can’t make sense of anything.’

‘The stories where I was the hero?’  Daryl asked.

She nodded in confirmation.

‘So you trust me...at least a little?’

She nodded again.

‘If you aren’t sure about something, you ask me. Maybe I won’t always know but I’ll try or I’ll find out. Except what happened when you were out there’ he added quietly.

Beth thought about this for a moment then opened her mouth but paused before finally asking

‘How long were we alone together, after the prison?’

‘bout a week’

‘that’s when I hurt my ankle?’

 ‘right. I was teaching ya to track and you stood in a trap’

‘and you carried me to a house with.... did you sleep in a coffin?’ there was confusion to her voice, she obviously didn’t trust her own mind anymore.

He nodded.

‘you aint so mixed up. That all happened.’

She shook her head. ‘I used to tell myself that as a story. It was my last good night and then it just became a story, doesn’t feel real anymore’ she looked up at him...

‘You really slept in a coffin?’

‘yeah and you played piano’ he said.

She covered her face with her hands and rocked herself for a few moments. She muttered something he couldn’t make out then looked up at him again.

‘I watched my daddy die didn’t I?’ she asked.

‘We all did. It was awful’

‘Was it my fault?’ she asked him.

‘Wasn’t nobody’s fault, I blamed myself for a long time though.’

‘Why?’

‘I’d been tryin’ ta find the governor, the trail went cold so I gave up.’ Daryl still felt guilty about everything that had happened that day. He’d wanted to put it behind him, forget about the events he couldn’t change but now he had to admit to her all over again that he’d let her down, all of them down and it was her father who paid the price.

‘How long have I been gone?’ she asked, not acknowledging his previous answer.

‘Just over three years, there abouts’

‘It doesn’t feel that long. I thought Maggie’s baby was Judith.’ She confessed, forgetting Daryl had been there to see it.

‘Is it really safe here?’ she questioned him

He shrugged ‘Nowhere is really safe but we’ve been here a long time and it’s done alright for us. The people here, they’re good people, there’s walls. We trade with others, haven’t had a herd pass through in a long time.’

‘Do they use girls here?’

He cringed and shook his head.

‘No Beth, its civilized here. Most civilised I’ve ever known life to be’

She sighed and looked him in the eye.

‘How old am I?’

‘Well you were 16 when I met you and that was almost five years ago so I guess you’re 21, 22 maybe’

‘really?’ she breathed

He nodded.

‘That’s older than I thought, younger than I feel’ she took another deep breath ‘how old are you?

‘Old enough’

‘You told me you’d answer anything’ she reminded him

‘Must be nearly 40’

Her eyes grew wide.

‘You don’t look that old’ she whispered.

He shrugged and silence washed over them both. She sat there sneaking glances at him and he kept his eyes to the floor, waiting for her to speak, wondering what else she might ask.

‘Did you ever see me kill anyone?’ she asked quietly

The question shocked him but he tried not to show it.

‘Only walkers’ he replied, ‘you stayed inside the fences a lot, at the prison. You were with the baby, out of harm’s way’ 

‘I was protected’ she stated, then continued ‘ I killed people, out there. I don’t know how many. I think some at that hospital. Maybe others...I...lots of blood and...’

Her eyes started to go glassy.

‘Beth, you alright?’

She dropped the glass of water to the floor and he rushed over to her.

‘Beth, stay with me. Beth, come on. Ask me something else.’ He pleaded with her as he took her hand in his, shaking it gently.

‘Your name’s Beth Greene. You have a sister named Maggie, you were born in Georgia, in the farm where you lived. Your Daddy was named Hershel and your Momma was Annette, you had a brother named Shawn. You like to sing and play the piano. You’ve read every Harry Potter book at least three times; you read the entire first one out loud to Judith, I listened to most of it. You looked after her almost on your own for months. You like cowboy boots and braiding your hair. You have a birthmark on your thigh the shape of Texas but you’ve never been there. You used to sing in a choir, you like the smell of peppermint’ a hundred little things he’d noticed about Beth in the two years they’d spent together flashed through his mind as he stroked her hand ‘come back to me Beth, come on’

Carol came in then and found them like this.

‘She’s alright’ she said walking over to him and placing a hand on his shoulder. ‘She’s going to do this, a lot.’

He stood up.

‘She was asking me questions, says she can’t remember what’s real. Then she told me she killed someone and just...’ his voice faded and Carol nodded.

‘It’s a coping mechanism.’ Carol stated and Daryl nodded.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_‘I’m pregnant’ Alice had whispered it to her in the middle of the night, once they were sure nobody else was coming._

_‘You can’t be’ Beth whispered back. ‘There’s no babies allowed, they’ve said that before’._

_‘Well they don’t do anything to make sure it don’t happen and it’s been months since I’ve had a period’ Alice replied._

_‘Maybe its stress, or the lack of food’ Beth asked hopefully_

_‘I thought that too, at first but look at my stomach, it’s rounder and last night, I felt it’_

_‘The baby?’_

_‘Yes’. Alice began to sob._

_‘And I love it Beth, God help me I love this poor little baby and I don’t want them to take it from me’_

_‘then we have to escape’_

_‘We can’t’ Alice’s voice was broken by her crying and Beth wrapped herself around her in an attempt to soothe her._

_‘We’ll think of something’ she said and fell asleep holding her friend._

_The next morning he came through the door, placed his gun on the table and approached Alice._

_She tried to fight him off._

_He smacked her across the face._

_‘I’m pregnant’ she said._

_‘Not for long’ he said and smacked his fist straight into her abdomen ‘no babies here’_

_He struck again and she cried out._

_Beth watched in horror as he beat Alice over and over again. She began to cough up blood._

_‘Beth’ Alice looked at her with pleading eyes but he struck her in the head and she passed out. He didn’t stop, as angry as Beth had ever seen him; he continued to strike Alice all over until her body was just a limp sack of bones on the bed. Rage filled Beth, the one person she had left in all the world was laying on that bed, dead because of him. She wasn’t thinking as she jumped up and grabbed the gun then pointed it at his head. As soon as she pointed the trigger she knew she’d made a mistake. The sound of the shot echoed through the trailer and temporarily deafened her. His blood has sprayed back all over her. Within a minute the door to the trailer opened and she was thrust into the blinding daylight. She felt a blow to the head and then the chains around her ankles. She was dragged by the feet through the streets as people looked on, some in horror but none did anything. She was shocked to see children playing and women hanging out washing. It looked like a normal suburb save for the naked teenage sex slave being dragged by her feet as the concrete path took the skin off her back. Finally they tied her to a light post._

_‘We’ve got someone coming in a day or two, been asking about you for a while. Best pray he’s still interested and that you make it ‘til his arrival’ the voice spat at her. The day was long and hot as she lay there, she tried to conceal herself but it was almost impossible. Men came to spit on her, she felt water on her head and quickly realised it was piss. She closed her eyes and prayed to whoever was listening. Once night fell a girl appeared, not much younger than herself. ‘Here’ she said crouching down to Beth ‘quick’ she placed a straw in Beth’s mouth and quickly she drank down some water. ‘take these’ she placed some painkillers on Beth’s tongue then offered her more water to wash them down. ‘I’ll try to come back later’ she whispered._

_‘I don’t think so’ a man’s voice cut through._

_‘We don’t help people like her. Maybe you feel sorry for her? For this whore? Well she’s only got what was coming to her. She killed Frank. Did you know that? She shot him.’_

_‘You kidnap them and rape them’ the girl fired back_

_‘Yeah well there’s a vacancy now, two actually’ he replied._

_Beth couldn’t see what was happening but heard a slap and the girl scream._

_He hit her again and again ‘No’ Beth called out._

_He pulled the girl back to the hand so Beth could see her, her nose clearly broken._

_‘This is what happens to anyone who helps you. She’s young, she got off lucky, next one wont’_

_He gave Beth a kick to the side for good measure and dragged the young girl into the night._

_An entire day passed before a van showed up and a blonde man in jeans and a cowboy shirt came to take her. Beth recognised him, he’d been a somewhat regular visitor to the trailer and never bothered with Alice. He was rough and always insulted her on the way out and yet here she was in the backseat of his van._

_‘You don’t speak unless spoken to. You don’t look at me. You don’t expect food or water, you’re nothing’ he said to her then continued to drive._


	7. No.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all the lovely feedback... it's been great and I really appreciate every comment that's been left.

Beth slept in the chair for a while, waking only when Carol once again tried to get her to eat something. She refused any actual food but accepted a glass of powdered milk.

‘It’s better than nothing’ Carol said gently ‘but you need to eat more Beth, your body needs to heal’.

She left the kitchen and found Daryl sitting on the front porch cleaning his bow.

‘Did we ever have sex?’ she asked, sitting down next to him.

He kept his eyes to the bow

‘No Beth’ he said firmly.

‘I was with someone, at the prison and it had to be a secret’ she said quietly.

‘Probably Zach, he was your boyfriend.’

‘Zach?’ she said bewildered. ‘I don’t remember a Zach’

‘He was young, good lookin, used to annoy me with all these questions. You and him were always makin’ out’

‘Then why was it a secret?’

‘Probably didn’t want your daddy to know’ Daryl said putting the bow to one side.

‘Well I remember that I had sex. With someone nice, and it was nice and it wasn’t scary’ she said firmly.

He looked up at her

‘Zach was a good kid, treated you right.’

‘Is he dead?’ she asked quietly.

‘Yeah, he came out on a run with me, got bit’

‘I can’t remember him at all, I know I was with someone but I can’t see their face or anything.’

 ‘He wasn’t there for very long. You didn’t really react, when he died. I think you were just trying to be brave or maybe you started copin’ just then; but I’m glad you’ve got that memory, not all men are pricks’ he said.

They sat there in silence for a few moments.

‘Did you have anyone?’ she asked.

‘I had my brother’ he answered.

‘No, like a girlfriend... or boyfriend?’

He smirked.

‘Not since you knew me. Not really beforehand either.’

‘What about you and Carol?’ she questioned.

He shook his head ‘More like siblings. We get each other’

‘So you just live together?’ Beth queried.

‘Everyone else was spoken for and the houses were too crowded. Me and Carol, we’re kind of the same.’

Beth nodded but she didn’t really know what he meant.

‘Her husband, he used to hit her, my pops, used to do that shit to me too and it could have destroyed us but it didn’t. Then all this happened and we kind of moved on from it.’

She looked up at him intensely ‘you have scars on your back’ she said slowly ‘like the ones on me?’

‘They aint as fresh as yours, but yeah’

She smiled lightly ‘then we match’

He gave a grunt.

‘Is that why I’m here?’ she asked ‘because I’m like you and Carol now?’

‘I think that’s part of it’ he said.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_He didn’t have a community or place to call home. The van was his life and he moved from one place to the next. He’d taken those chains with him and used them to keep her in one place wherever they went. He told Beth his name was Tony but she was never to call him by name, never to call him anything._

_‘What about the walkers?’ she asked once_

_He slapped her for speaking_

_‘They won’t find you if you don’t make noise’_

_Sometimes he bought other men back with him. One night as many as four had all taken their turn and in her mind Beth told herself stories. She told herself she was a princess locked in a tower and her Prince Charming was on his way, he’d just taken a few wrong turns._

_One guy, Arnold, freaked out when he saw her._

_‘Ain’t right man’ he said. He’d had dinner with Tony while Beth watched. He’d offered her some of his food but Tony wouldn’t let him._

_‘Doesn’t get hungry like us. Only hungry for one thing’ he’d said with a wink._

_Arnold marched over to Beth and tried to feed her a spoonful of his beans_

_‘Can’t have her looking like that while I’m full’ he said_

_‘I said don’t’ Tony had a gun to Arnold’s temple. He tried to push it away but Tony shot._

_‘Great, now you’re fucking covered in blood again and I’ve got to find a way to clean you.’_

_The next day they walked to a lake and he insisted she bathe. It was cold but when she closed her eyes she could pretend she was a little girl swimming in the river behind her grandmother’s farm._

_She held onto the memory the next few nights as they passed through a larger town and once again Tony traded for food and clothes. He wrapped a black silk robe around her. ‘I’m too good to you’ he said._

_The next town they reached, Tony met up with his brother. Beth marvelled at just how many men seemed to be surviving out here and wondered where the women were. Had every man in the world turned into a sadistic sex fiend, so desperate they’d sleep with a malnourished, beaten teenager? Nothing made sense anymore._

_She closed her eyes and thought of Daryl. She remembered the way he’d carried her when she hurt her foot, like she was precious and important. She thought of the way even when he was shutting her  out he had looked after her, fed her and expected nothing in return. She remembered their last conversation and she knew that he had cared for her and sex had been the last thing on his mind._

_Over time that story changed. ‘Who the fuck is Daryl?’ Tony asked one night. ‘You call out his name a lot, must have been someone who had you before me’_

_‘He was my friend’ Beth said_

_‘Daryl don’t sound like no teenager’_

_‘No, he was older’_

_‘Yeah and I bet I know exactly what he wanted from you. You’d have been a looker if you didn’t earn yourself all those bruises’ he said ‘that Daryl was only after what we all were. Must have been a good fuck if you still call out to him’ Tony said._

_‘It wasn’t like that’ Beth said_

_‘Sure it was’ Tony said then pulled the robe off her ‘Come on, pretend I’m Daryl.’_

_She cried until it was over._

_He hit the side of her face with his gun._

_She blacked out. That was happening a lot, sometimes because of the violence but more often than not, her mind just shut down. It had started in that trailer and was getting worse. She couldn’t shake the feeling she was losing days at a time. She would suddenly find herself in places she’d never seen. She was trying to walk but the chains were always around her feet and she’d thrash against them for  a moment before she remembered._

_Sometimes they gave her sleeping pills because they said she called out in her sleep otherwise and put them all at risk. She couldn’t believe these men could see her up close every day and still treat her like this._

_She tried to tell herself stories of Daryl, of the good man that carried her when she hurt her ankle and wanted nothing in return; but something had happened to her mind, ever since she watched Alice die and honestly a little beforehand. She tried to picture Daryl but all she saw was dark hair poking out of a coffin and she knew that couldn’t be right. She recalled they fought and he took a piss in front of her, on the floor of a house and she couldn’t remember if the Daryl she remembered was really a good man or not, she just needed someone to hold onto in her memory and everyone else she knew was dead. She’d known that for a long time. Maybe he’d only saved her because he saw her worth... for this..._

_\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Daryl watched her as her eyes clouded over again and she began to squirm

‘Beth, come back to me Beth’ but she slapped him, wildly she hit out until she hit him hard with her broken wrist and fell to the floor in pain, suddenly lucid again.

He stood there and waited for her to finish.

He wasn’t angry at her, even her strongest fist couldn’t really hurt him but seeing her like this did.

He tried to keep his face blank ‘Beth, stop’

She sunk to the floor

 ‘Hey, hey, what’s going on?’ Rick had been walking past and saw her attacking him.

He looked at Beth, curled into herself on the decking crying, Daryl trying’ to hold himself together.

‘Ok, ok, everyone calm down.’ He placed a hand on Daryl’s shoulder but he nudged it off ‘I’m fine’ he said but the look in his eyes told a different story.

Rick knelt down beside Beth

‘Beth, are you ok?’

She tried to sit up

‘I, I hit him’ she said.

Rick looked up at Daryl ‘why don’t you head on inside?’ he suggested. Daryl nodded and entered the housed.

Beth tried to calm herself down.

‘I...he’s good isn’t he?’ she asked Rick

‘Daryl?’

‘yeah’

‘yes he is, rough around the edges but his good. He’d do anything for you’

‘why?’

‘because you were all he had left, or so he thought, you and him got close, he don’t talk about it so I don’t really know.’

‘He tried to find me’ she said ‘everyone tells me that’

‘it’s true’ Rick said

‘These guys, they tried tellin’ me that Daryl must have been like them. I’d been telling myself these stories about how he was a good guy but then, I got confused. I forgot some of what they said, until just then and it made me so angry, not knowing who to trust’ Beth spoke too quickly, like she was nervous.

‘You can trust him’ Rick said firmly ‘he’s looking out for you’.

‘Can you go and tell him I’m sorry?’ she asked.

Rick shook his head ‘no need, there’s nothing he wouldn’t forgive you for’.


	8. Chapter Eight.

Carol had invited Maggie and Glenn over for dinner.

‘Where’s the baby?’ Beth asked, a little dismayed they had turned up without her.

‘Carl and Enid are babysitting’ Glenn informed her.

‘I haven’t seen him yet’ Beth said sadly.

‘You will. He’s desperate to see you’ Maggie spoke up ‘was asking all about you before we left.’

‘Is Enid his girlfriend?’

‘Yeah, she’s a nice girl. You’ll like her’ Maggie told her sister.

Carol had once again begged Olivia for the best they had available and had put together a wonderful dinner, with as many of Beth’s favourites as they could manage.

Everyone helped themselves to large helpings of the pasta and salad except Beth who picked through and chewed slowly on the tomatoes.

‘Bethy, please eat something else. Denise told me if you don’t eat a little more you’re going to have to go in there on a drip’

Beth stopped eating to look at her sister.

‘You can get used to anything. I’m used to feeling hungry. I don’t want to eat a lot.’

Maggie met her gaze ‘well if you can get used to anything, then you can get used to feeling full again too’.

‘How about just trying some of the pasta?’ Glenn asked, dropping a small serving of it into a bowl and pushing it in front of her.

She looked up at Daryl with wide eyes

‘Do I like pasta?’ she asked.

He nodded at her.

‘You used to request it at Christmas every year Beth’ Maggie added ‘that’s how much you like it.’

‘I...I haven’t seen any in a long time.’

She allowed herself a small mouthful then smiled at Carol ‘it’s good’ she said.

She ate another two bites then pushed the bowl away.

‘I don’t want to push it. I’ll have some more salad though’ she said.

Around the table everyone smiled at each other, this was progress.

After dinner Maggie and Beth stayed in the kitchen to clean up.

‘I got used to a lot of things’ Beth said quietly.

‘You can talk to me about it all’ Maggie said.

‘Not all of it. It’s hard, being here, trying to learn how to live again’

‘You were alive that whole time’ Maggie said

Beth shook her head ‘Nah, I was just surviving.’

_\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

_They dragged her from place to place._

_One night she figured out how to unhook the chains from her feet. She crept out of the old warehouse they were staying in and ran off down the road. She made it three blocks before they found her. She reached for the knife she’d found on the way out and held it towards Tony’s brother._

_‘You wouldn’t’ Tony said, ‘Not a weak piece of shit like you’_

_She stepped closer and pulled the knife across his neck. Blood began to spray as Tony looked on dumbfounded._

_‘You’ve done me a fucking favour’ he said ‘that assholes been bugging me for weeks. Always asking me to give you more food, let you have a night off. Ha, you have no idea what’s in store for you now’ He was talking like a mad man. Beth didn’t know if he was suffering from grief or shock or both. Her hands began to shake, the sight of the blood made her feel sick. She put the knife down and began to sob._

_‘That’s right little girl’ he said to her ‘you tried to play with the big boys and you thought you won, but you were wrong’._

_She didn’t stop him as he ushered her back into the car. She was shaking and cold now, she hadn’t noticed before that it was snowing. How could it already be winter? How far north were they? She couldn’t keep track of anything anymore._

_In the coming weeks, Tony’s violence reached all new heights. She learned how to stitch herself up from the meager first aid kit, learned how to treat burns too. The food that had already been sparse seemed to vanish all together. She was so hungry she ate anything thrown her way, normally his scraps. He found another man alone on the road. They made her life miserable. She came to long for the times when her mind checked out._

_\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Daryl came back into the room then and pulled out a jar of peaches.

‘You were a big fan of these too’ he said holding them up.

The sight of them made her wrist ache.

 ‘Not anymore’ she said, ‘I know that much’. Tears began to well in her eyes but she didn’t want to succumb to them, didn’t want to fall back into her memories of the time she was away. She searched her brain for a distraction...

‘Did we burn a house down’ she asked him urgently.

‘No Beth’ Maggie said as though the idea was ridiculous.

‘Wasn’t a house, more like a shack’ Daryl said nonchalantly as shock coloured Maggie’s face.

‘Some rednecks place, got drunk on moonshine then burned it down.’ Daryl explained.

‘I thought I imagined it’ Beth said.

‘Was one of the better nights of my life’ Daryl replied.

Beth’s eyes lit up in a way Maggie hadn’t seen them since her sister had returned.

‘You got my little sister drunk?’ Maggie questioned, though her tone was light.

He just shrugged ‘She wanted a drink, how could I say no?’

Beth brushed the small tears that had formed from her eyes.

‘Tell me all about it’ she asked so Daryl sat down opposite her and began the story of the night she had saved him from himself.


	9. Live.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really loved Carl and Beth's friendship in season 3 and was always a bit disappointed we never really saw them interact much after that... I really like the idea of them as good friends and of course, her reuniting with Judith so I really enjoyed writing this chapter, hope you all like it too.

Beth was sitting on the porch when a young couple with a small girl approached her. She would never have recognised him without that hat, the same tattered hat he’d been wearing since his Dad passed it on back at the farm house all those years ago. The sight of it made her heart ache.

‘Carl’ she jumped up to greet him.

‘Beth, it’s so good to see you here’ He said beaming.

‘This is Enid, Enid, Beth, Maggie’s sister’ he introduced them.

Enid grinned up at Beth and looked a bit misty eyed ‘You’re almost like a myth, Maggie’s beautiful missing sister’ she said.

Beth’s eyes dropped to the little girl with the braids

‘Oh my goodness’ she said tears springing to her eyes.

‘I’m Judith’ the little girl said

‘I know you’ Beth replied as tears began to fall.

‘Why are you sad?’ little Judith asked

‘Oh I’m not sad. I am so, so happy to see you.’ Beth said ‘you look just like your big brother’

‘We look like our Mommy’ she replied. ‘Not Michonne, our real Mommy’.

‘She’s pretty hung up on that at the moment’ Carl said

‘Asking all sorts of questions’ Enid added.

‘Your Mommy was beautiful’ Beth told Judith ‘she looked after me when... well when my Mommy wasn’t there. And then I used to look after you’

‘But then you went away’ Judith said.

‘I did’ Beth nodded brushing tears from her cheeks.

‘My Daddy said you used to sing to me all the time because I wouldn’t sleep’ she said.

‘That’s right.’ Beth said

Judith reached up and grabbed Beth’s hand.

‘Daddy said you aren’t feeling very well and we shouldn’t visit yet’ the little girl whispered ‘but Carl said we could’

Carl’s cheeks flushed

‘You weren’t supposed to tell her that’ he said.

He looked at Beth ‘Didn’t seem right, to know you were here and not come to see you.’

‘Thank you’ she whispered

‘You’re still crying’ Judith said.

Again, Beth nodded and the little girl threw her arms around her neck.

‘Please stop crying. We’re all very happy. I even have a Cinderella dress just like the one she wears in my picture books’ Judith said and they couldn’t help but laugh at her.

‘Daryl went on a run just to find it for her birthday’ Enid said ‘but it was about three sizes too big so Carol resized it’

Beth was smiling wide as she thought of Daryl out hunting for a princess dress; and realised once and for all he was the Prince she’d told herself about and not a single thing those men had said about him was true.

‘Daryl gave you your first bottle’ she said to Judith.

‘And my first ride on a motorbike’ she replied ‘but don’t tell Daddy’

They left not long after that and Beth sat in the sunshine smiling for a good hour after. This is what she’d been waiting for, this feeling of normalcy that had been missing for so long.

 

_Days and weeks bled into each other. She knew they were in Virginia now, not too far from DC. She remembered seeing the city from the distance. It was the bright spark in their weeks on the road. They didn’t use her for trading anymore. That had stopped a long time ago. Now she belonged just to them which only mad their violence worse. She knew it wasn’t about the sex, she figured they must like the feeling of control in a world that had fallen apart. Sometimes they left her alone for a few days, chained to whatever was close by, but they’d leave water and occasionally food. She liked those times because she could disappear completely into her thoughts or sleep and not worry about what was coming next. They hardly saw walkers anymore, the ones they did see were so decomposed. She wondered if soon there’d hardly be any left._

_She had given up on trying getting away from them. She was so weak these days and she didn’t want any more blood on her hands. Although she didn’t try to escape, she didn’t try to end things either. She’d had plenty of chances, could have reached for their gun during the night, left wounds untreated and so on. She never did. In her own meagre way, she was still fighting, still hoping something better was to come, and waiting for a miracle._

_One time she heard another group of people. They were in an old garage and others came in but Beth hid herself. She’d been told to, told nobody would treat her better than them, that anyone who tried to help her would be killed, and in that moment there words got the better or her. She sobbed afterwards._

_The next time she heard people approaching it happened again, she panicked but couldn’t move herself enough to get away. When she recognised the faces of those people she didn’t know how to respond. How, after all this time, had they found her? This was her miracle and yet she couldn’t break free from this feeling that Tony would get back and kill them all, she’d seen him kill so many people. She didn’t know what to do, her mind wouldn’t think and so she lashed out until they drove her away. They finally put an end to it all._

Beth knocked on Daryl’s bedroom door.

‘C’min’ he called out

I’m sorry’ she said as she walked in.

‘What for?’ he asked

‘Everything I’ve been doing since I got back, for leaving you alone that night and getting taken, for getting out of that hospital where you might have found me...’

‘Stop’ he said gently.

‘Ain’t none of it your fault. It’s just what happened. I don’t give a shit how you’ve been since you got here. You can spit on me, throw things at me, hit me, if it makes you feel better.’

‘but I don’t want to, treat people like that, it’s not me’

‘I know. We all know, you’re just coming back from something bad and you’ll do things you don’t want to, make choices you can’t explain, lash out, break down. I get it, I’ve been there.’

‘With your Dad?’

‘My whole life until I met Rick, Carol, the rest of you’ he said, ‘I was just drifting, survivin’, it’s all different now’

‘That’s how I felt’ she said as she sat on the edge of his bed.

‘You know Denise? She’s a psychiatrist or something. You could talk to her about all this’ he said quietly.

‘I’d rather talk to you’

He made a grunting sound that seemed so familiar it made her smile.

‘I remember when you didn’t even talk to me at all’ she said quietly, throwing herself back so she was laying across the bottom of his bed.

‘I think you were too scared to speak to me’ he said.

‘And then we bonded over Judith?’ she questioned.

‘Yeah, before that a bit, but mostly Judith.’ He sighed ‘you can survive on very little sleep’ he said.

‘Not anymore, I feel tired all the time.’ She said sadly ‘and confused, dazed almost’

‘You’ll bounce back’ he said firmly ‘not back to who you were entirely, but you’ll sleep and work and eat and maybe one day you’ll sing again and be happy. You’re not all gone, that thing that made you special, its still there’ he blushed a little as he spoke and was thankful she was staring at the roof and not at him.

‘What made me special?’ she asked

He groaned ‘You know’ he said

‘I don’t or I wouldn’t have asked’

‘Your sweetness, your hope, your optimism, your patience and kindness and honestly and ability to call me out on my own shit. You were there for everyone else all the time. Now we’re gonna do that for you. I’m gonna do that for you.’

Beth couldn’t think of a reply so she just sat there and breathed out an ‘oh’.


	10. Love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well I sat and finished editing the last two chapters tonight so figured I might as well just finish this story off.   
> Thanks for all the great feedback, I was so nervous about posting this fic but its actually been a really rewarding experience.   
> It makes me both happy and sad to see so many of us Bethyl fans... we were SO ripped off!!!

The days turned into weeks which turned into months. Beth had her good days and bad ones. She had days she hardly left her room, wouldn’t eat. There were nights she woke up screaming. She would be happy and friendly for a few days then become completely withdrawn again. There was no fast way to recover from what she’d been through. Through it all she had people who loved her, her family, even those they’d acquired in the time she’d been away, stayed loyal to a fault and endured everything she put them through, put herself through. Mostly though, she had Daryl. They’d seen his softer side before, they knew he had a good heart under that facade but now it showed through more than ever. He spent nights by her side, talked her through her violent rage. He gave everything he could to help her and expected nothing in return.

After a while, she was okay again. It happened slowly until it was a whole month since she’d blacked out, longer since she’d lashed out at them. She’d taken to slipping into Daryl’s room at night. She’d perch on the end of the bed and ask him questions. Sometimes the same ones over and over, as though she was testing either his response or her own memory.

This night was no different. Just after midnight he heard his door squeak open and went to sit up.

‘Did I cry when my Daddy died?’ she asked him

He sat up and nodded.

‘Yes. But you were strong, you didn’t really have time to mourn.’

‘I remember putting flowers on his grave’ she said.

‘Not his grave, just one that said father on it.’

‘We didn’t bury him?’

‘We didn’t have a chance’ Daryl said.

They sat there in silence for a while.

‘You carried me after I hurt my ankle, the same way you did when you found me’ she said. He wasn’t sure if it was a question or a statement but he replied anyway.

‘I did, like I was carrying you over the threshold’ he laughed

‘We were going to stay there weren’t we?’

‘The funeral home? Yeah’

‘It could have been so different’ she said then softer ‘but we wouldn’t have anyone else. I wouldn’t have met my niece... maybe, maybe it had to happen like this’

He didn’t respond, couldn’t respond. He didn’t want to find anything that could justify what Beth had been through.

Suddenly she moved, she crawled up the bed and sat next to him, even slipping her legs under the covers.

‘Do you love me?’ she asked

He nodded.

‘I thought so.’

She reached out her hand and he took it.

‘I think... I think I love you too, I’m just, just not sure if that’s ok right now?’

He didn’t reply just ran his thumb over her hand, waiting for her to continue.

‘There’s nobody else I want to spend my time with like you’ she whispered then moved again until her face was resting on his chest. He let go of her hand and put an arm lightly around her.

‘I just want to be held’ she whispered ‘want to remember what it’s like to feel safe with someone again’

‘Whatever you want Beth’ he said gently.

‘Can I stay here tonight?’ she asked

‘For as long as you want’ he murmured. He could feel that she was crying, her tears ran onto his chest. He stroked her back.

‘I love you, I’ve loved you for the past five years, but you need to take your time, it’s all on you, what you want’ he said.

She nodded against him and he felt her breathing start to labour, like she was resisting the urge to cry harder.

 ‘It’s ok, it’s ok’ he held her tighter.

‘You really are the hero’ she said between sobs.

‘From your stories?’ he questioned

She shook her head

‘Better than that, thank you’

She lifted her head to plant the softest, sweetest kiss on his lips and felt herself begin to heal. She felt the pain of the last few years began to fade away and her heart begin to heal. This was better than any story she could ever have told herself and best of all- it was real. She had walked through hell and back and found herself back with her people, with him. She kissed him again, longer this time then snuggled back down against him.

'You ok?' he asked, holding her tightly.

'Better than ok' she replied. 'I might be confused about somethings but not about you. I'm going to live a long and happy life. I'm going to kiss you again, I'm going to sleep here all night. I'm going to marry you someday' she whispered.

He  stroked her arm while he absorbed what she said, took in a deep breath and repeated 'someday'. 

 

 


End file.
